One day my ability to communicate was gone. I tried to approach people and express my needs but they simply cannot hear me. They can’t understand me.
When I travelled to Bolivia, I passed by Sao Paulo, Brazil for another 24 hours layover before arriving to Bolivia. After a long 16 hour flight from a layover in Dubai, I had an allergy. I was badly sneezing the whole time and my nose was clogged. I lost access to my medicine kit because my luggage had to be checked in. My only reprieve at the time was hot water from the attendants’ pantry.
When we touched down Sao Paulo, Brazil things got worse. It was 7 degrees Celsius. I was freezing and my good sweater was in my luggage which I will yet collet after another 24 hours in Bolivia once I arrived. I spent 24 hours in Brazil. I planned to go around the city but my feeling started to get worse so I did not go far from the airport. My voice was husky, my eyes were reddish and I was sneezing the whole time. I was afraid they might suspect I have had COVID19.
The first thing I did was to look for pharmacy and buy at least an antihistamine. When I entered the pharmacy, everything and everyone was Portuguese. I asked the attendant for antihistamine but she could not understand English. I tried opening my internet for google translate but the airport wifi did not support Google translate.
She finally understood me when I spoke my little tiny spanish: “Señora, tengo alerhia.” She said many many things which I did not understand. She left the cashier and showed me something in a box which reads “Histamin.” It sounded like antihistamine but I was not sure if it was the right med.
So I sent a message to a friend from the Philippines via messenger asking if he could google the Portuguese of Antihistamine. Luckily the message came through. So I went to pay the meds but the pharmacy did not accept US dollars. They only accept Brazilian real.
Again… I have to look for currency exchange. I was pissed off holy smokes at this point. I really hoped all people around the universe spoke English.
After I bought the antihistamine, I went to a nearby coffee shop to take in something for dinner. When I was in the counter I ordered coffee and a sandwich and again the barrista did not understand me. He was speaking a lot of things in Portuguese. I was pretty sure he was asking what type of coffee or size or if it’s hot or cold something’s to that effect. I did not understand anything so I said “Excuse me sir, can you please repeat it.” (Like I’d understand at all even if he repeated it under times. Hehe) He smirked indicating he is frustrated (so was I BTW), and I felt judged. Hehe.
He spoke several hundred nothings again but I captured 2 words: quente y tamanho. I am sure they are the same in spanish caliente and tamaño in Spanish. They mean hot and size. So I said in my mind, may be I could use the little spanish I have. So I said “Si caliente y medio por sabor.” His face looked relieved and I think he realized I know a little spanish. Brazilians speak Portuguese but they also understand spanish.
(You see I prepared for Spanish but not Portuguese.)
After eating and taking med, I became relatively well. I planned to go see the city at night but it was really really cold outside. Good thing there were good hotels inside the airport. I rested well. (It was during this time that I learned about the earthquake in the Philippines that damaged the Bantay Bell tower, the Bantay Church and Vigan Cathedral).
REFLECTION:
I have always been an opinionated person.
I find strength, power and belongingness when I express the little knowledge and opinions that I have.
No matter how brilliant or complicated my way of thinking for most occasions was, I was struggling to be understood in this particular instance - an instance of utmost physical necessity.
Arriving in Bolivia I had to study spanish for 3 months. Equally, I became mute for several months in order to learn not jus another language but another way of life and another perspective. Both my mouth and my perspective was muted as I study another ways of approaching things. My theology, my Philosophy, my homilies, my cooking; all of them had to be muted in this new world.
Perhaps, God leads us to speechlessness because we wants us to enter into a new order of things. Is this not what is prayerful silence is all about? God makes us inarticulate so that we could re-articulate our situations. St, Therese of the Child Jesus became the Great Doctor Thérèse because young as she was, she was able to articulate her situation and her divine experiences.
Zechariah became speechless because his mindset was still at level of human limits. In Luke 1:18-25 Zechariah asked the angel, “How can I be sure of this? I am an old man and my wife is well along in years.” Yet he forgot he is in-front of a great mystery, a mystery he had served all his life at the temple. He forgot that his God is a transforming God and faith must be transformative.
For me, since that funny day in Brazil, I have assumed the journey of Zechariah. I became speechless because I was about to witness a transformation. I was about to begin a new mission, a new participation in the work of God. Zechariah gained back his speech after he participated in the mission of God. The fullness of his mission is the naming of John in Luke 1:63 “His name is John.”
At this stage, the happiest day of my life in Bolivia was when I was able to speak straight Spanish for an hour in class. I expressed my opinion, I told stories, I defined things, I shared my activities to my professor. It was my Benedictos Moment or the Song of Zechariah when his speech was given back.
I know there will be more occasions when I will be muted, unheard, rejected, and left out of place. This is because I am not done learning yet.
My brothers and sisters, if you are lead to silence, that is because you are not done learning yet.
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